WinJewel support desk is available 24 hours a day and 7 days a week.
The next time you call, remember that the support person may be unusually frustrated because they just finished with a call similar to the following:
WinJewel support: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one...
WinJewel support: Click on the "my computer" icon on to the left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
WinJewel support: WinJewel, How may I help you?
Customer: Hello... I can't print.
WinJewel support: Would you click on "start" for me and...
Customer: Listen pal; don't start getting technical on me!
I'm not Bill Gates, dammit!
Customer: Hi, good afternoon, I can't print.
Every time I try, it says "Can't find printer".
I've even lifted the printer and placed it in front of the monitor,
but the computer still says he can't find it...
Customer: I have problems printing in red...
WinJewel support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah....................thank you.
WinJewel support: What's on your monitor now, ma'am?
Customer: A teddy bear my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11.
Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
WinJewel support: Are you sure it's plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can't get behind the computer.
WinJewel support: Pick up your keyboard and walk 10 paces back.
WinJewel support: Did the keyboard come with you?
WinJewel support: That means the keyboard is not plugged in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there's another one here. Ah...that one does work...
Customer: I can't get on the Internet.
WinJewel support: Are you sure you used the right password?
Customer: Yes, I'm sure. I saw my colleague do it.
WinJewel support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five stars.
WinJewel support: What anti-virus program do you use?
WinJewel support: That's not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry...Internet Explorer.
Customer: I have a huge problem. A friend has placed a screen saver on my computer,
but every time I move the mouse, it disappears.
WinJewel support: How may I help you?
Customer: I'm writing my first e-mail.
WinJewel support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter 'a' in the address, but how do I get the circle around it?
AND OUR ALL TIME FAVORITE
(THE NAME IS CHANGED TO PROTECT THE INNOCENT)
WinJewel support: "Okay Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at the same time.
That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen.
Now type the letter "P" to bring up the Program Manager."
Customer: I don't have a P.
WinJewel support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean?
WinJewel support: "P".....on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I'M NOT GOING TO DO THAT!